Just what the doctor ordered

It was him,
slowly burning my fears,
taking away the pain,
the horrible thoughts,
all that led me astray.

It was him,
waiting for me in the hallway,
patient- yet restless,
checking his watch,
in sync with his heartbeat.

It was him,
slowly turning my blues into hues of bright yellows,
my insecurities into fiction,
my greys into the definite blacks and whites,
all of it- with a side smile.

It was him,
never showing creases on his forehead,
while kissing each crevice on mine,
so slowly, so lovingly,
I forgot I ever had sleepless nights.

And oh yes, it was him,
walking a step behind me,
not just to catch me if I ever stumbled,
not just to be the assurance if I was ever scared to go ahead,

also to soothe my wings every time I had to fly. 

The place below the light

Under all that charm,
was a dark place.
A place hidden from the bright blinding light of positivity,
because it wouldn't help a goddamn thing.
It was the place where I kept all the people I lost.
The ones I have hidden so their loss doesn't paralyse me,
doesn't make me dysfunctional- both mind and body,
so their loss is something I know is there,
but I don't let it surface back to my edges.
Nobody can know about that place,
it is sacred, it is my inexplicable weakness and
the one thing that can cut my legs off anytime it wants to. 

Let me fall, don't catch me now

Back and forth like a pendulum,
We kept fighting and making up,
Baby my head is dizzy now,
And I don't think I can stay on this ride much longer.
Forgive me, if you can,
'Coz my heart is shredded to pieces,
and my mind is torn apart,
I don't know how we got here,
But its time now, for me to depart. 

No cure

It's not a bad day darling,
Its bad love,
Creeping into our bloodstream,
Which I thought was the vaccine,
But you showed me- it is the fucking disease.