Wednesday, April 26, 2017

Tell me how

I need you to tell me, love
That after you left me on the verge of tears that day,
How did you drive back?
How did you eat a piece of that chicken with your friends,
when the first thing I tried to eat made me nauseous enough to pass out.
How did you sip that beer,
when a sip of water was a task for me because I was shaking so bad,
How did you laugh with them,
when you knew I was in a pool of my own tears at home..
How did you not call me,
when you knew I would have it in my hands- waiting for you..
How did you convince yourself that you're a good person,
when you're just an asshole with a nice smile. 

The circle of hurt

You shook my world in two lines and asked me if I am crying.
No I wasn't.
I wasn't crying, darling- I was ruined.
I was thinking of how I will stitch myself back this time,
how long will this wound take to recover?
I thought you'd drained me of it but hey!
I bled again. Scarlet red- reeking of your name.
So I will convince myself again tonight,
that I have nothing left to give you and that my heart doesn't have your name over it.
And for the next time this happens again,
You'll whisper you're sorry and I will tell you to just get me a band-aid. 

Sunday, February 26, 2017

Heeding to the heart

Doctors dissect the heart,
meticulously, with utmost precision to learn how it works..
To know the curves and crevices, the arteries, the ventricles, the valve..
To understand how this vital organ sustains human life.
If you ask a poet,
they will tell you-
give it a love so strong that can survive the greatest calamities,
give it hope that the wounds it has suffered will one day just be scars which won't hurt,
but most of all,
give the heart what it wants, and it will live forever. 

Fell out of love

I didn't know you could fall out of love with someone,
I thought love was LOVE.
The thing that didn't know any bounds,
the permanency of this concept was engrained in my bones.
Until that night,
when I saw you look at me in the eyes,
saying you love me, so very much.
Because all I could see was empty words,
your distant eyes,
an unknown tone and I knew.
I knew what the reverse of falling in love looked like. 

Friday, January 27, 2017

The place below the light

Under all that charm,
was a dark place.
A place hidden from the bright blinding light of positivity,
because it wouldn't help a goddamn thing.
It was the place where I kept all the people I lost.
The ones I have hidden so their loss doesn't paralyse me,
doesn't make me dysfunctional- both mind and body,
so their loss is something I know is there,
but I don't let it surface back to my edges.
Nobody can know about that place,
it is sacred, it is my inexplicable weakness and
the one thing that can cut my legs off anytime it wants to. 

Thursday, January 19, 2017

Let me fall, don't catch me now

Back and forth like a pendulum,
We kept fighting and making up,
Baby my head is dizzy now,
And I don't think I can stay on this ride much longer.
Forgive me, if you can,
'Coz my heart is shredded to pieces,
and my mind is torn apart,
I don't know how we got here,
But its time now, for me to depart. 

Fix me, soldier

I peeked into my heart,
and shuddered.
It was dark, messed up and broken from various corners.
Then I saw it,
Just a fibre of you- fighting all the others,
crushing the darkness,
cleaning the mess,
and fixing the broken.